The last few days – unbeknown to you guys – I’ve felt a bit like I lost my direction-not that I had one in the first place I suppose…
I set out with my heart a day mission in mind as a spontaneous and personal project. I mean if I told you that the concept was selfish one – to have more ‘me time’ would you believe me?
I’m not going into it at all and doubt that I ever will -all you need to know is that at some point last year I realised I lost myself. Sounds silly right…but until you start saying someone else’s birthday as a natural response to being asked for your own, or not knowing whether you would or wouldn’t like to do something, or where do you start and they end? At best you might be able to understand…but can you relate to it?
Anyway through 2011, this project has given me a new direction, its opened me up to a world I’ve not known, find treasures of friends and helped me grow from the inside out. I love it! But every now and then I think I take it for granted. I forget the root of the idea (myself) …my heart art starts to become something that must be done, I must experiment – I must, I must make it this and I must make it that.
I suppose what I’m trying to say through all of this waffle and without preaching like I’m stood up in an alcoholics anonymous meeting – some days I create heart arts I’m not proud of and it’s rushed, sometimes its just a generated idea in the rough thats won’t get followed up, then sometimes like today – you get a whole load of me. Whatever is out there…bring it on bitch :0)